Stalkers are everywhere, you may not see them well that's because they are hiding. I'm serious! I'm just getting over it, well still going through it. Do you ever get over it? Do you ever trust again? Do you ever love again, want to love again?
It is hard enough today to have a relationship without having the feeling of being smothered or controlled by someone or something. Yes, I said something. I mean your phone, computer or other electronic device you may have that can "track" you down. Personally I was in a relation ship for several months and thought it was going great. We spent a lot of time together. We went places and enjoyed each others company. It wasn't until one day when we got into out first disagreement when I realized something was off. I felt as if his actions were like we should have been in high school or even middle school. I said something immediately. This is not me at all. I am by no means in any was a drama filled person. I stay as far away from it as I can. If you bring drama to me, I try not to get involved. I may give you advice; you can take it or leave it, your choice. Other than that, no drama for me unless it's on television.
I tell him, look, I think you are acting like you are in high school and need to grow up, leave this bullshit at the door or bring it back to where ever you got it from, I don't need or want it. The look I got was new for me. I never saw that from him before. Me, all of five foot two and a half inches tall, and 115lbs., yes I have to put that half inch in there, especially when you are my size. He was six foot four and weighed 240. This was my normal type guy. I like them big and burly, usually. Anyway, the look was just strange, eyes down and pierced through me, but as little as I am, I don't take shit from no one, big small or indifferent. This is my life, home and my kids are here, so I'm like a lioness guarding my cubs.
I asked him if he had a problem with me asking him that and he just said nope, nothing. He promised it would stop and didn't realize he had been doing it. I should have known right then and there, but I has married previously for nearly 20 years so I never had issues like this before. My ex-husband and I were together for three years before we even got married. My life was always simple, and now it was drama-filled and seemingly complicated within 6 months.
What the hell was I thinking? I should have just left him that first time I had that gut feeling, but no, I let it ride. The questions start, where you going? With who? How long? These are all questions that I have never been used to, like I said my ex-husband and I were just so used to doing whatever for so long, that it was natural I guess, WRONG. This was the stalker guy and I had no idea. I was answering and thinking it was normal, when all along it was him controlling me, keeping tabs and knowing everything about me, where I was and who I was with at all times. Who knew? I had no clue.
Oh, you should wear this it looks so great on you, wear your hair up it looks so much nicer or I like it when your ears show he would say. It was his way of controlling the situation, easily, and without me noticing. Oh let's eat here, I don't like this place. Why do you hang out with that girl, she brings you down or they are crazy or they drink too much or they treat their kids bad. They will always try to keep you away from any of your friends that may have something bad to say about them. Well holy crap, it took so long to realize this, well for me it was only the matter of a few weeks, but I know women who are still in those relationships. Even during sex, there would be something. I can't do this because my side hurts or you're so much better than I am. They will always make it sound better for you to gain the upper hand.
My favorite line of shit is that they are going to go to counseling or they are going already and even bring you a card. I have had it done to me. Anyone can go into an office and ask for a business card. They come up with fake diseases or sometimes real ones that they always blame on something or someone else.
Nothing is ever their fault, ever. They feel alone and desperate and they are usually a smart ass. Most of the time they are a really fun person and fun to be around when you are friends. All of your friends love them, but once you are in a relationship with them, thats when it all changes. The controlling, desperate need for having you there all the time.
I am so very glad that I was able to break out of it and go, but once I told him and left is when all Hell broke loose. 127 phone calls over 50 text messages, flowers, everything. When I told him I was calling the cops and not answering his calls that was the breaking point for him. He tried to run me off the Interstate. He swerved into me doing nearly 70MPH and run me right off the road, then went in front of me and slammed on his brakes, all of this during rush hour traffic. Nice guy, as all his friends had called him previously...nice guy my ass! He took the day off, borrowed a car and drove over an hour to run me off the road because I wouldn't answer the phone. This is a full blown stalker! He is crazy, psycho and just an all around piece of shit in my book! I was never so scared in all my life, I called 911, and cried and cried, and the anxiety was just off the charts. Never in my lifetime have I ever experienced this. I would never want any woman to have to go through this, ever.
The State Police came to me on the side of the Interstate and calmed me down and we tried to call him back. He is so crazy, that when the State Trooper left a voice message to not ever call me again, he called back, the SP answers, the stalker-boy hangs up. The he texts me and asks if its my new boyfriend I'w with, WTF?? Really?? I'm sitting there with the SP and he just looks at me and I said, "See, I told you he was crazy!" This just went on and on for months, he didn't stop, driving by my house, calling, texting me and he even tried to sell my brand new vehicle online. I mean, what kind of normal person would do this? None that I know of, so the only conclusion that you can come up with is that he was a stalker. He knew exactly what he was doing. He had done this all before and knew the system. It's a shame that you went to prison in Virginia and I didn't know that before hand, because if I did, I absolutely would have never dated you. You kidnapping someone and trying to harm a police officer there wasn't a good thing either. Its all public information and anyone can look it up, once you put your name in, poof, there it is. Is this why you had a heart attack and was in the hospital and couldn't make your court appearance or did you fake that too? Was the stress too much for you? He knew how to get way with things, how long to wait, everything.
There are some things he didn't know though. He still doesn't know things like people follow him all the time. He will be caught one day and karma is a bitch. Whenever you do something online, it is a federal offense and it will catch up with you especially when there are trackers on everything. Just because you think you know everything doesn't mean you do. Do not fall into the trap of a stalker, they are sneaky, conniving and just not good for the soul. Run, run fast and don't turn back. There is someone out there for everyone and hopefully it's not him.
If you feel that you have been the victim of a stalker, please don't hesitate to call 911 and report it.
If you feel that you have been the victim of a stalker, please don't hesitate to call 911 and report it.
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