18 and Knowing It All

The days of having 12, 13, 14 or more kids of more of a thing of the past; today, even four or five kids is out of the question anymore.  It seems more and more people are waiting until their late 20’s, 30’s or even their early 40’s to have children.  For what, to be more monetarily stable, career orientated first, to live their wild days before they have to take care of kids, or just to raise their one and a half to two children. The census seems to say this is the average family household now with a dog or cat.  If that’s not the age group then you’re 16 to 20 and have one or two babies already and letting your parents raise them for you, because you have no job and you feel entitled and that’s not knowing it all, otherwise your parents wouldn’t be raising them. 
The 18 year-olds have no job, are still living at home, and decided they don’t need to go to college because they’re smarter than the teachers now; thank you Google.  They live for free in some cases, come and go when they please, disrespect and disrupt the entire household, then continue to blame anything and everything on everyone else, no matter the situation.  If anyone says anything, they’ll respond with something like, “I didn’t choose to be born”.  I get it, okay, well then move out, get a job and leave me they heck alone if you can’t stand being near me, in this house and for free, or close to free.  I brought you into the world in hopes you’d be a loving, caring respectful person and not an ungrateful person who thought that they were entitled and undeserving.  
Everyone deserves to experience life, in their own way.  In doing so, you have to take responsibility fo your own actions.  Going to school, having relationships, having your own children. If you choose to have a child, raise them on your own.  It’s not wrong to ask for help, don’t expect it and don’t pass them off on your parents or grandparents, as you feel you may be entitled to do.
In some households, the grandparents are raising the babies, leaving the 18 year-olds to go and do whatever they please, because they know it all.  Of course they do!  They know a lot more than we did, because technology is growing in leaps and bounds and they’re being taught at the age of, well before birth how to use a computer, a cell phone and iPad or a tablet.  Heaven for bid they don’t get that computer time, they’ll have a screaming fit.  
No matter which child it is, the baby or the 18 year old know it all, they cause a fit if they don’t get their “screen” time in.  We as society live by this all too much, we allowed it, we made it happen.  What happened to going outside and playing on the swings or riding bikes.  The 18 year-old, not knowing it all and asking for help, not excepting it.  How can we reverse things?  What in that tiny little device makes it so appealing, that it’s so much better than a human touch, or emotion?

Pick up the phone and actually call then instead of texting; go physically hug your mom, dad, family or friends instead of sending that emoji, it really does help, it truly does.  We all send those ridiculous email forwards, or possibly post on twitter, FaceBook or Instagram for that matter, about depression, or loneliness, hatred and the facts are this, if you’re 18 and know it all, how come you don’t know that the human touch, physical voice and actual contact is much more life changing than a post on a computer. So you don’t know it all.  Depression is terrible and texting or posting doesn’t come close to sitting with someone and just listening.

If you want to make the change in this world and know it all, then be the change, call someone, be there for someone in person, hug them in person, love them. 

Its been a long time.

It's been a long time.  I can't even count the days.  The last time I even looked at a calendar it was July, I swear, it really was, only to realize it was my mother's birthday and with that I then realized it was more than half the year already.  What the hell?  When did this start happening me?!  No, not me?  I can remember my mom telling me once you get out of school days would fly by like weeks and weeks, like months.  I just chuckled and brushed it off.   It was nothing to me to hear her talk like that.  The ol' times (I'd roll my eyes).  Oh crap, I will NEVER talk like that, I swear!.  Well, shit, crap, crap, shit, crap. and on and on.  I talk like this all the time.   What the hey!  Can we turn back time, please?!  Yesterday, Marty McFly (you know the movie Back To The Future) was going into the future October 21, 2015 to ride his Hoover board and be cool with all his new gadgets like the talking phones, well we have FaceTime (thanks to Apple) and everything else that have already imagined, so whats next?  One day goes by and well in 24-hours is like nothing, just nothing.  Why sleep?  It just seems like a waste.  Yes, recharge and renew, but why let time just slip by us and not see what is going by every so slowly or fast as it may seem.

Babies grow; technology grows even faster.  People are born; war kills them faster, so what's the difference.  We grow and die only to find out what? We know how to live and die?  Why hold back the truth, to make the unknown suffer, or the suffering unknown? Is it a cruel world or are there just cruel people running it?  My most amazing thought is that I live happy, no matter, look around and I bet you see it, happy people, everywhere, smiling, just truly happy, be happy, radiate happy and, really live it; be it, be happy and you will understand happiness my friend.

North or South

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It doesn't matter how many times I look out the window on Christmas, I don't think it will snow here for me.  This doesn't change anything does it?  Heck yes it does!  I feel like it changes everything for me.  I know it doesn't but, it seems as if going from the North to the South just changed so many things, but most of all Christmas.  I am used to it being cold, brisk and somewhat windy.  It usually snows, okay, it hardly every snows, but the last few years it has been snowing and it's been great.  The blinding rain and ice is what it usually does, still, come on, it's the North.  Good old fashioned Christmas.  That's what it is.  Brrrr, freeze my tush off, send the kids outside, bake cookies and have friends come over the next day or three for left-overs.  The South, well not-so-much.

I moved over the summer, basking hot July, not the best time to move in the heat, but it was the time I had.  Me and my girls, both graduated from high school and away we went to start our new lives.  I merged with my boyfriend, who came up from Florida.  I know, he's now going to freeze and I will sweat, lol.  That is where your wrong.  I am still cold and he is sweating, believe it or not.  I am cold blooded, freezing all the time, and could live in the tropics for sure.  He, on the other hand, is perfectly fine here.  I have no idea why I am this way, I am always cold.  In any case, it's just gorgeous here and we love it.  But, Christmas is here and I miss the snow, the feel I suppose of it, what it seems for the season of Christmas.  My family is back North, well most of them and my friends, so I miss them also.  Its very hard all the way around.  That's it, just all of it.  I know we will all get used to it, never, and I suppose they can come visit us here at the awesome beach, when they have a vacation.  It's just that time of year we all get that blah feeling like we have to have everyone next to us and the fire going, with the snow on the ground, and a cozy blanket, not watching the surfers.  Unless of course that's where you were raised and are used to that, then I suppose it would be weird not to have it.

So I ask you are you a North or a South?  I was born a North, but now I'm a South and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Waste… of time?


I wrote this paper March 14, 2002 during college and it will never be a dying subject.

Waste.  Is it a waste of time?  How many of us recycle? I mean actually recycle. How many of us care?  I mean care about the future.  Does recycling really work?  Do the landfills really recycle?  These are just a few questions that come to mind when I think of garbage, refuse, trash, debris or any other word that means waste.  We live day to day without a notion about where or how waste is disposed of.  Should we have to worry about recycling?  It’s not our duty to make sure the landfills are doing their jobs, or is it?  If we stopped for one instant and thought about it, we’d realize that it is our job, because we all live on this planet together and created the waste to begin with.

“Americans generate more waste every year, growing from 247 million tons of non-hazardous waste in 1990 to 490 million tons in 2001”, according to Biocycle magazine, an industry publication.  According to the website,” Americans generate trash at an astonishing rate of four pounds per day per person, which translates to 600,000 tons per day or 210 million tons per year!”  (www.howstuffworks.com). They continue to say that this is almost twice as much trash per person than in most other major countries. The majority of this trash is buried in landfills.

What is a landfill?  It is a carefully designed structure built into or on top of the ground in which trash is isolated from the surrounding environment such as groundwater, air, or rain.  This isolation is accomplished with a bottom liner and a daily covering of soil.  There are two types of landfills: sanitary and municipal solid waste landfill.  The sanitary landfill uses a clay liner to isolate the trash environment and the municipal solid waste landfill uses a synthetic or plastic liner to isolate the trash environment.  A landfill does not decompose garbage quickly.  When a landfill closes, it must be watched and evaluated for 30 years after the closing. 

We need to recycle.  By recycling, we will reduce the amount of trash that needs to be buried. In 1991, the U.S. population was 249,439,545 and (mostly) municipal waste, which was generated in tons, was 293,613,000, with 11.5% if it recycled.  In 2001, the population was 286,345,000 with 409,029,000 tons of mostly municipal waste and 32% was recycled.  According to the website, “Although 32% of municipal waste is reported as recycled, there are two problems with this; one, is the EPA estimated in 1998 at municipal waste was only two percent of all waste generated.  Secondly, the total amount waste generated, recycled, or disposed is not fully known because the EPA has not collected work to confirm that data“ (www.zerowasteamerica.org). 

Waste disposal statistics do not take into account waste that is disposed (burned or landfilled) on-site or off-site and illegitimate dumps and incinerators, which include burning barrels.  The statistics also do not include waste that is recycled and in an environmentally destructive matter, such as the so-called, "beneficial use" recyclable.

So let's say you do recycle, do you really think the workers who pick up your trash put it and a separate section?  They must, because if these workers who pick up your trash, were following recycling regulations, the percentage of recycled waste would not have nearly tripled.  Imagine what the world would be like 20 years from now, if we didn't recycle.  It's the three R’s, recycle, reduce, and reuse.

There's are numerous ways that we can cut down on waste.  Instead of buying plastic cups, forks, knives, spoons, and other disposable products, we should reuse the glasses, or silverware that we already have in your home.  Personally, I think recycling should start with manufacturers.  Some of these companies make it too easy for us to toss these products in the trash can, rather than a recycling bin.  Another example of unnecessary waste is the computer; how many of us own home computers?  What do we do with them when they become obsolete?  First off, sure, we try to resell, but when that fails, where do they go?  In the garage, basement or storage unit is usually where they end up.  We should make the big companies take them back and let them recycle the products they manufactured.

Years ago, McDonald's used to use Styrofoam containers, now they use paper.  I don't think that McDonald's decided on their own that they needed to use paper for better recycling purposes. I think environmentalists pressured them.  Maybe they saved money at the same time, and maybe not.  The one thing that I am sure of is that we all need to recycle.  Recycling will not only help the environment; it will also reduce the amount of trash in the landfills.  With more and more landfills closing, by the time our children, or children’s children grow up, there will be virtually nowhere for the trash to go. 

I can remember when I was a child, my mom used to tell me stories.  One story was about a dump close to where I live.  Many people refer to a landfill as a dump.  They are not the same.  A dump is an open hole in the ground where trash is buried and has various animals like rats, mice and birds swarming around it.  My mom used to go shooting with all of her friends at this dump when she was young.  They would shoot the rats, and mice just for fun.  The dump is no longer there, but in reality, it is, it is only covered over by dirt and plants. To this day there still is a “for sale” sign posted on the property.  It makes me wonder if the person who buys the land will be told about the dump that originally existed there.  Is the reason that the sign is still there because people know there is a dump underneath?  Is it that they don’t like the land?  The point is that we don’t know where all of the old dumps are and unless we ask, we will never know.

If we knew years ago how much recycling helped us, most old dumps would not be closed or hazardous today.   How do we know if the water we drink is contaminated by waste from old dumps? We don’t.  For that matter, how do we know if the development we live in or by wasn’t constructed over top of an old dump?  Did you ever ask?  The only way questions like this can be answered, is if we ask.  Knowing is just the beginning, but educating people around us will make them understand that recycling isn’t a waste of time.  Just remember recycling today will make tomorrow a better, cleaner, and waste-less place.  Live, laugh, and love.


How do you know when its time to go to the doctor?  I know as a mom and my child screams there are all different types of screaming, yells, quivers and hollers.  One can be loud or soft and some can be said with a huge attitude, you know what I mean, "What! Mom!"  Sometimes you get the sibling rivalry and the often, more than not fights up and down the hallway.  Oh the good old days.  Yup, seems like yesterday.  But now that I am an adult, all grown up and girls of my own, and I have been to the doctor many, many, oh too many times to count, when do you really need to go to the Urgent Care or ER for that matter?

Urgent Care or Emergency Room, whats the difference?  The other day for instance, I was just meandering along going through some papers trying to file old papers, finally.  That boring stuff no one wants to do, well most of us, anyway I started getting dizzy, then cold sweats, real bad, I was so sweaty I had to change my pants instantly, put on shorts and started fanning myself.  Then I became so dizzy, not realizing what I was doing and unaware of the time.  I started pacing of sorts, I thought I had a fever, but checked and didn't.  It was the cold sweats that made me feel as if i had a fever.  I felt as if my head, well my brain actually, was swimming in my head, floating of sorts.  The room was silent, I didn't have any music on or the TV, and I had no headache at this time.  For those who know me, this is quite strange, I always and I mean always have some sort of a headache.  I normally get migraines so this was quite different for me. Then in an instant I was nauseous, ran to the bathroom and nothing, up in my throat, burning, and still nothing, dry heaves, twice and still nothing.  It was acid reflux of sorts, but yet nothing. What comes next?  I am faint, a dizzy spell again, can't think, cold sweats, unaware of what's really going on and oh I had a massive sciatica attack to the point that I was in bed and hurting for the two days prior, yet at this moment I have no pain there at all. It all seems as if the pain had disappeared just at this time because all my energy and efforts were pointing to the fact that I had no idea that the Hell had been going on except the fact that I was feeling, well, out of sorts; not me. 

My youngest daughter comes in to ask me something, nope, no clue still now what she had asked me and I say to her, go tell your sister that I need her to take me to the Urgent Care, I feel like crap. She asked me if I was okay and I just said nope.  My older one comes in and says what's going on?  She looks and me and says, "oh mom, you look like crap."  Gee, thanks and I feel like it, I tell her.  Anyway, she say to me that yes, we need to go and I grab my stuff and off we go.  I was so dizzy that I could barely walk out the door.  I was walking quite slowly and to the side.  Holy shit, I have never, ever in my life felt like this, well that I recall, remember if you had been following me, I did have brain surgery back in 2005.  I have no idea what the hell was going on.  I seriously thought I was having a heart attack or mini-stroke, after all I did try to google the symptoms, yup me, dr. mom.  Scared the shit out of me, to the point that I knew something was wrong.  I was so scared that I went to the Urgent Care instead of the ER.  Yup, crazy me.  No chest pains or numbness in the arm, no headache, so I figure the Urgent care was the place to go.

Walk into Urgent Care and they knew something was up, we do the normal routine, insurance cards, triage, and then comes in the doctor.  He starts asking me questions and me, I thought I was doing a great job of telling him what I thought the problem was and I can vaguely remember him keep looking at my daughter and thinking why.  She finally tells me that he looked scared, like he had no idea what was wrong.  Well shit!  She tells me I was taking 30-60 seconds to answer him when he asked me a question.  Ohhh, who knew?!  I thought I was right there.  I would tell him I felt that was for about 20 minutes or so when in fact I had been there for 45 minutes already, hmmm, well add another 30 minutes on top of that and that would be how long I was feeling that way.  Again, I had no idea of time, none.  In the end, I am still somewhat confused as to the diagnosis, not sure if I had an actual seizure, but it seems to be the fact that my medicines were off.  The seizure medicines I take from the brain tumor that is still in fact, in tact in my brain, ugh.  Go figure.  All that and that's all he had to say.

Now I wonder, should I have gone to the ER?  Did he do everything he should have?  He did run a CAT scan.  I do feel a lot better now, but still looking back, would it have been better for me, yes more expensive, but the fact that they could have checked all of my blood levels, oh and done an EKG, etc. because I know the Urgent Care didn't.   I can't undo what's been done, but I do think that next time it's the ER, just to be safer. Which one would pick?  Live, laugh and love        

18 and Knowing It All The days of having 12, 13, 14 or more kids of more of a thing of the past; today, even four or five kids ...